Unless you are under the age of 9 or legitimately mentally retarded, there is no reason to ride your bike on the sidewalk. Further, if you choose to ride your bike on the sidewalk (which, just to reiterate, you should not unless you meet the above criteria) you certainly shouldn’t make it everyone else’s

responsibility to get out of your way; people who are engaging in the perfectly reasonable activity of

walking on the sidewalk. That would be very silly of you.

You shouldn’t ring your little bell (and if you have a little bell on your bike you should either meet the aforementioned criteria or suffer the consequences (which are me sticking it up your ass)). You shouldn’t say”on your left”, making your problem (that you’re a retard) into everyone

else’s problem. If you need people to get out of your way, and this need is so deep that you’ve purchased a gay bell to ring to let everyone know that you, the retard, is approaching and they should steer clear, the one place you most definitely should not ride your bike is the sidewalk. Because the sidewalk is where everybody is! No one’s expecting an overgrown nine year old with shorts and an ice cream cone to be riding up their ass ringing a bell. Just do us all a favor and move away from the city. Probably nobody gives a shit if you ride your bike on the sidewalk in the suburbs.

Put it on the list for fucks sake.